Meltdown

When we brought Little E home she would only sleep 1-2 hours in her bassinet before waking up. I didn't realize that was normal.

One month later, and she won't sleep in it at all. So yesterday I finally washed all her crib bedding and took the plastic off the mattress... I put her in there during the day, and she loved it! She didn't sleep, but I thought getting her used to it was good anyway.

When Mark and I switched shifts this morning, I fed her, she fell asleep, and I thought, "What the heck, let's give this crib thing a try..." She's been sleeping in there for 2 hours!!

And what am I doing instead of sleeping?? -Having a complete meltdown! I feel like this is the equivalent of her leaving home for the first time, like she doesn't need me any more. I'm sitting in her room, crying, researching SIDS, and checking her every few minutes.

How do I let go? This is such a small step.

I didn't realize just how much I need her and how important it is for me to feel needed by her.

This is a new kind of love.