All the Single Ladies

Any single ladies out there? I'm convinced that Dick's Sporting Goods is the place to pick up men, especially at this time of year.

In fact, I'm not so sure they don't sell them there -- too easy? Today while Christmas shopping, I navigated my cart through aisle after aisle of Burlington's finest.

So, I would like a lady to try the following and get back to me about it, preferably before Christmas:

1. Go to Dick's
2. Choose a sporting section -- probably best to choose something you wouldn't mind your future husband doing every weekend for the rest of your lives.
3. Fishing, you say?
4. Go to that aisle.
5. Scope out a fine catch from afar.
6. Approach him nonchalantly while pretending to shop.
7. Don't be skanky -- check for a ring.
8. Say something alluring like, "Nice rod." (This will probably catch his attention even if you're not in the fishing aisle.)
9. Make eye contact, smile...
10. Report back to me.